When's the last time you did something for the first time?

I think I knew I would self- destruct, and that's why I didnt finish curating this blog the day I first opened this. We often mess up so bad to the point where nothing and nobody feels like home anymore. I literally messed up and asked someone who clearly doesn't wish me greatness: what's out there for me after this? I wanted to end my story but while I was dying I was being taken to hell, and I realized that there's no way to benefit if you don't know how to protect or even stand up for yourself. I was made to look crazy, to look off balance so that the grim reaper could complete his plans to kill me, and nobody would even dare try to save me. I'm so used to throwing myself off of cliffs when I'm put in challenging situations. I never liked facing myself and what I did that got me too close to the mirror, but how could I ever grow from the ashes if I wasn't ready to see who closed the cage -to keep me stuck instead of just giving me a mome

All I needed to do was breathe, but instead I chose to suffocate all for a love that was burning way too fast. I gave myself a golden curse by destroying my talents, day by day and night by night -revolving my most inner peace with someone else's magical distrubance. I almost died chasing a pain that didn't feel good. The pain I was introduced to had me sliding down a wall, it had me questioning everything I am and everything they said I was -when I wasn't that. I was just trying to show them me, and they were too busy making me a product of their past. They were shaming me for their poor discernment. They should've seen the fox in sheeps clothing. They should've seen that the wolf wasn't really the grandma, and after all in the end the wolf never actually really had asthma -but a plan to steal what wasn't their's to take. With me by their side I could've seen what was coming, and I could've... I could've...Keanu what could you hav

Where have I been? Where did my expanded but under the table words go this month? I Mean could jump on your back and question you as well, but I'll admit that I've been a missing file that thought that she'd always find her way back into the dectectives file cabinet for safe keeping, so I thought. I really thought I was doing myself a service by choosing to keep myself hidden even after the veil of isolation lifted. I thought I was making the right choice to stay where I always had been -which was in the state of comfort. I didn't want to admit that my self proclaimed state of "comfort" was really a prison meant for actual prisoners and not people who courageously found the strength to leave their traumatic past. But now that we're here, now that I'm back where I want and need to be... let me explain to you just how clearly a staircase will present itself when you're ready to make up your mind with the right amounts of space to trust the univer

It was you. It was always you. It was you that played the video game and somehow your October wasn't all that bad. I mean maybe I'm speaking for myself, but I had to allow October to run it's course. I had to in fact allow october to run into a wall, so that I could handle what October's redundant handler was wickedly handling -time and time again. It's always been about time and what it's been overly doing. Life is mallory, but only to those who don't step in and take their reigns. I may or may not have refreshed what was so clearly being replayed. I couldn't stand all of my previous Octobers', and I had to cry it all out to be able to see November. Maybe I have a plan that doesn't allow some if not most energies to come with, but at least I can come back and be a confidant to your unlocal misery, right? What did October tether you to, and how did you make it here? How did you make it to November? Did you slide, crawl, run, skate, glide, walk