They were only there to break my heart...

By Itgirl Overload
What if I told you that you're not the victim, but the enabler. We're sitting in unkind places looking for just ourselves, and in that lonely but blank state, there's someone in the dark staring at us. It's always the same energy but with a different face. I'm terrible when it comes to retreating, and I know that. But today, right now, I think I'm beginning to see the issue. Today's day one of redirecting what keeps killing me. The person I chose to break my heart this time was slightly crueler than the one before. I spoke up too fast, and I chased them in such a tiny space. I made them want to hurt me, and now they're acting like they want something more now that I'm bruised, and once again totally checked out. This person once again reminds me of my first bully, and somewhere inside of myself people that embody my first bully makes me feel safe, but the rest of me hates that I always feel the exact some way -comfortable with continous chaos.
So, I was thinking I could either wash my pain away with more pain, or I could take a chance on my pain and listen to it. I figured that it was better to uplift it in such a way that it brings about change, instead of just suppressing it or even allowing other toxic peope to know what's hurting as well as bothering me -only to be let down by them when they find it more fitting to bring it up when I'm finally seeming to be doing okay if not just better. I thought it was only right to transmute it by talking to you while listening to an uplifting playlist. I think its time to expand my giving nature into other inspiring things instead of wasting it by giving it to doubtful people. What do you think? Are you willing to do the same when you're feeling hurt, and most of all, sick of feeling hurt? they're only in our space only to break our hearts and that's okay Let's change the way we see ourselves when we make another mistake... xoxo ItGirl OverLoad xoxo so this is what change looks like on day one, follow me to see what each day brings!!!!

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