Unintentionally well-spoken Wicked Wednesday's...

Don't ask me where I come up with these names, because if I could answer this question without going off the deep end I would. I'm actually at the edge as of right now so if you really want the answer, do what's in your reigns and push me off. Don't worry my spirit will tell the cops I told you to do so. I'd tell them that I gave you my permission -with my last dying breath. I wished it so, but I was too much of coward to actually do it myself. But here we are on this wonky wednesday night and I created a piece that could send me to both to heaven and hell, but wouldn't you want to know -where I'd actually choose to stay if given the permission to do so. I don't know if I'm sad right now or if my body is allowing me to shed another layer of myself to actually get to the real me.

I think I'm a banshee but why won't I fully claim what I tragically claim to be? I always need to scream when it's quiet. I always need to scream when I'm going through something -even it's just a mental flashback. But why don't I? Enough is enough. I'm holding back on valuable knowlegde, but there I always go running back to what is making me want to scream. I speak of my mother when I speak of satan because she's that and then some. She's the muse in every poem that I so often write. She's the reason why most times I feel like both the banshee and the snake. So here it goes... "The banshee was a snake before it was ever the banshee" In the beginning my body wanted to hurt everyone without hurting it's own shell My mind was seemingly wiped clean after every encounter with every one of my victims. I wanted them knocked down but not completely uselss -you fucking maroon I wanted, in fact, I needed them to see the nasty motherf*cker that slammed them on their backs in the first place. Me hurting people was my way of screaming without actually having to scream I couldn't solve my own issues back home so I was both hell bent and abnormally fixated on becoming someons else's problem. I was both the snake and the victim -but mostly the in between I was perfectly fine in another life but that seemed like a life time ago I was going through my one and only biblical era and some ancient old and corrupted devil got inside of me and made me a monster. I was never given a chance to scream because not long after, I was cursed. I was cursed to roll on my belly and til this day I don't even know if that took away my natural abilities or if it made me more of a snake I was on my way to hell and I still hadn't had the time to accept my fate... I still hadn't had time to scream. MY TRAUMA FEELS LIKE A LIFETIME AGO BUT WHY AM I STILL TRAUMATIZED??? Everything I do comes in three's so am I half evil or am I that much closer to finding and witnessing my truth? xoxo ItGirl OverLoad xoxo