I Couldn't Help It...

By Itgirl Overload
I try so hard to stay within my own bubble, to stay far far away from those who are wounded. wounded guys I mean. but ughhhh something about them is so damn tasty. something about their broken wings makes something inside of me stir. it makes my feel like I can do it. like I can both revel and live within my trut,h while saving the guy that I can so clearly see I had a past life with in another lifetime -at some point. but why now? why must we meet like this in this lifetime? why did we cross paths when we did, and how the hell can I go back in time, so that I could've stayed at my event later to have manipulated my footing so that brushing shoulders with you wouldn't have come into fruitation, because what if I wanted to keep all of my fruits for myself. I hate sharing when I'm the one who eats so little.but anyways, stay put. and grab a snack or two or perhaps a drink or three and lets see if my very nature will either facilitate a new version of myself, or impede the self development I've been working so hard to gather.
I wonder if I should do it or not. if I should go through with it or not. if I should block it off, or allow it to be the start of my incredible and fabulous weekend. should I overlook their emotionless habits, or should I let my wild and untamed nature bring them back to earth -to the fabrication I created to ensare them for an eternity, because honestly that is what I'm good at... I mean hell, I've been doing it for so long, I feel outside of myself when I'm not doing it. for the past couple of months, I thought that I wanted to go at it alone, but it seems like the more beautiful I get, the more I crave a kind of presence only the opposite of myself can give me. I could've sworn I wanted to be loved less, and that I wanted to be the only one to provide for myself, but lately I've been severing myself from that level of thinking, because I realized I blindly almost gave away my bed. my freaking bed of all things. but perhaps the start of this weekend could be a great lesson. a great test. a brilliant opportunity for me to practice what I've been affirming -to be feminine without being taken advantage of, even if the entirity of what I've been studying came in the form of a familiar sensation. a sensation I somehow used to know.
WISH ME LUCK, I GUESS!!!!! what if today turns out to be a really delicious day, since I am divinely protected. xoxo ItGirl xoxo. I often send kisses to the universe.

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