September's here and so it begins!!!!

By Itgirl Overload
Before you start, I already know that I promised something that I didn't give. I already know that. And am I beating myself up over it, no. I know that I can be an unprofound person, but I'm also well aware of my gifts. One empty handed promise doesn't override all the other decent words that I've spilled. I've just so happened to have spilt my past over and over again without sounding redundant -and still I can see myself spilling more... and more. It's just who I am, I'll never be able to let go of my past because in a sense it'll be me letting go of the worst parts that turned me into a poetic killer. I'm a time machine but I'd never screw with my past if it meant not being able to flourish in a diabolical sense. So here we are reliving the 4th day in this chilling month. It's September and what do you know. I'm here again because I can still see my past again.
Seasonal Depression is a real thing... and I never wanted to see it as such but after a while not seeing the patterns just easily makes you a difficult and unbearable paradox. I get pyhsically choked up in the fall and it quite literally makes me fall... but in what year do I myself take the intiative to change the narrative. I can either be a victim or a girl that took it upon herself to rewrite her story. Fall didn't tear into me but it gifted me so many memories that I'd do anything to feel once more. But like I said I can easily rewrite my story by birthing new and existing projects... that's a start, right? I can tell myself that this year will be different because I CAN DO DIFFERENT THINGS FOR DIFFERENT RESULTS. I can either b*tch and moan or I can get up and heal. I REALIZE THAT I HAVE TO PUT DOWN ONE AND PICK UP THE OTHER!!! Am I afraid? No, actually but am I curious? Yes. Yes I'm very f*cking curious... but will that stop me. No. No I truly hope not. xoxo ItGirl OverLoad xoxo

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