My crazy thoughts~ Time is frozen where I am

By Itgirl Overload
I've been up all night trying to find value in my own mind, or am I trying to devalue it? I've been overdosing to stay still... mentality or it is to stay physically still? I wonder who can see my silhouette when I'm pacing back and forth. Do I seem crazy to them, or can they relate to my madness? My antics aren't my own,but I carry them as such. Why? I try to destroy myself, but I can't quite do it right. I wanted to stop the pain, but all I did was delay a natural process -that my body's supposed to go through. I didn't mean to do it I swear, I just wasn't up to feel the pain my body is so used to feeling. I didn't know I would still suffer if not more.
My message to you is to go and even grow through the pain. I tried to stop my natural body flow, and now I'm up way past nine -trying to find some sort of conclusion to all of my fears. Something inside of me wants more, a difference I can't quite explain, but I know that I've been there before. My soul has already been where I yearn to go. Fragments of me stayed there, and now all of me wants to go back there. I want to leave all of this behind. I don't want this to be all that I know, but I know that in order to move on, I can't keep abandoning myself. I have to be a guardian to my darkest fears, and bypass the solitude that'll for sure demote my guaranteed removal of this outdated place. I'M GRATEFUL FOR THE CHANGE, BUT I'LL BE THE FULL VERSION OF MYSELF WHEN I LEAVE ALL OF THIS BEHIND!!!! There's a power outage in my mind, and instead of figuring out what's my next move, I'm taking things that only leave me paranoid and out of the state of in control. xoxo ItGirl OverLoad xoxo

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Being a girl brand (The side that needs fixing).

By Itgirl Overload
Creating a brand from stratch is already scary, but doing so while being a girl is way more complicated. Especially living in today's day in time. It has gotten even worse as the generation has continued to move forward. It's to the point where society(Mostly men), have decided that their birth right, includes speaking loud, and mighty proud against women. Mainly getting the message across in, such a negative and demanding way. Examples being, "you're only pretty if ...." , " if you want a man then.....", "women shouldn't do.....", etc. The list could honestly go on and on. By no means is this blog post somely to bash men but..... Things like this need to be said, because this is gotten, too out of hand. I don't know if at this point guys are "trying to help", or if bashing women is way to fun in their eyes, to stop now. But in my opinion, I feel as if a women's business, is just that , A WOMEN'S BUSINE
Read more

Ladies You've Seen This Before

By Itgirl Overload
Image
Be happy to be a woman. Most importantly be happy that you were gifted with female intuition. You can see things before they happen,consider yourself a psychic. You can sense war before soliders are led to their execution, that's because you have a great sense of smell. But beware with a great sense of smell, this forces you to smell the BULLSHIT as well. Your eyes are sharp for a reason, why didn't you become a spy? When you touched him, you also touched her, don't lie to me. Same taste different body? You've experienced this before why are you surprised? I get it... us women are natural nurtures. It's in us, every single one of us. It's undeniable. It sucks when the wrong people take your gift for weakness. When will it end? When will you say "enough is enough." If your head isn't screwed on properly they'll take your castle down, from the inside out. You need to see past the bullshit. This time you need to get it right. REFUS
Read more

Lately I've been thinking about Taylor Swift!!!!

By Itgirl Overload
Image
Miss Taylor Swift is the best. Taylor S. is both an icon and an inspiration. She's up and down my 2024 vision board. She reminds me everyday to never forget the foolishness brought on by others, and by others I mean insecure people. I mean, have you ever put a clown on a pedstal? Have you ever found yourself chasing someone else when you should've been coming back to yourself? Don't be ashamed because I've done all of these things, and once you've done these things once, sometimes it's easy to fall victim to doing it again. But in the end what do you gain, when you put others first while putting yourself last? I think we can all agree that 2023 was a horrible year for us creatives. It was a wrecking ball for us dreamers, because we mostly found it most profittable to stay stuck in endless dreams than to actually do those same things in real life. But like my last blog post about Miss Taylor S., we can learn a lot from her, so buckle up, because we're abo
Read more